It's official: I'm the most underrated James Beard award winner ever (and other news)

June 23, 2011

After we missed out on the Olympics, the biggest contingency of bummed Chicagoans were protesters. After all, with no Olympics, who would they be able to protest against? They had to throw away all their "chalkie" shirts and clever protest signs. But have no fear Chicago protester, President Obama has thrown you a bone.

The G-8 and a NATO summit are coming to Chicago in 2012.  This is huge. I think rappers should start rapping about the G-8, not G6. That would make more sense. So the downtown economy will get an influx of rich people, and East Humboldt Park will get an influx of protesters. Memo to Ukrainian Village mini-marts: stock up on the American Spirits.  Memo to downtown liquor stores: Stock up on insanely priced bottles of booze.

Forget about these conferences helping the local economy, I thank the President for bringing some news to town! Love it!

B story: I'm kind of liking the new Chicago police superintendent. Not only does he sport some kick-ass razor-like Oakleys, but he uses words like "obliterate" when talking about gangs and crime. This is a direct quote:

"Every one of their locations has to get blown up until they cease to exist."

Very Robo-Cop, eh? And he's kept his word - arresting over 120 members of the Maniac Latin Disciples. Only 19 are in jail right now, but still. McCarthy is like a mixture of Ray Liotta and a Ditka.

C story: Ooouch, Airbus is kicking the crap out of Boeing plane orders. Airbus is the Prius of planes. So that makes Boeing like an old Chevy Malibu. Yikes.

Weather: Are you serious ComEd? There are still people without power today? That sucks. I think it's rebate time.

Sports: The Chicago Bulls had to move their draft HQ because the Berto Center in Deerfield, IL was without power. They moved it to the UC, but I was hoping they would have just moved it to the local Caribou coffee - if only for the image of six Bulls front office guys sitting around two small footrests trying to steal wi-fi to draft a forward from Kentucky. Then some teenage barista forces them to order something and Paxson is forced to buy 16 mochas...

Or they just go downtown to the UC. 

Here's an argument for casinos in Chicago: The Boston Bruins celebrated their Stanley Cup championship by racking up a $156,000 bar tab at the Foxwoods Casino outside of Boston. Just think if we had a Chicago casino for Patrick Kane? He would have single-handedly paid for the renovation on Wacker with a little left over to pay the teachers.

Kicker: Today, my James Beard fame goes from underground to front page. That's right, I am mentioned in this year's Best of Chicago, put out by the Chicago Reader. This is really the definitive Chicago "Best Of" and I'm honored that not only did they let me tell my story of winning a couple James Beard awards a decade ago, but they ran this picture of me on the front page of their site!!!!

I hate this picture because they cropped me out of a Schadenfreude pjoto.

I should have sent them this one. Look at that hair!!!!! No big deal, I wore that medallion around for like, four weeks: