Is it possible for Chicago to trade both Zambrano and Briggs for, like, 500 cops?

September 2, 2011

Sources say Carlos Zambrano will not be returning to the Cubs next season. It's time to queue up great memories of Zambrano swearing, spitting, pushing, fighting and pointing to the sky because God lives there. There was a no-hitters in there too, but mainly Big Z will be remembered for what he lost (his cool) more than what we won (baseball games).

I love this move. You have to purge this squad. I think the team has done a pretty good job this year of removing players and personnel who stand in the way of progress. Fukudome, Hendry and Zambrano (and probably Quade) are no-brainers. And as a Cub fan (and Chicagoan), you have to like the moves heading into the off-season. It's like watching a new TV show. Yeah, it is intriguing. I'll sit through the commercials to see how it turns out.

Now, could we possibly trade Zambrano ($15 mil +) and Lance Briggs ($6 mil +) for city improvements? More cops on the street? High speed transit to the airport? In and Out Burger franchise? Seriously, these dudes are paid way too much.

B story: Now this is a good 9/11 story. We are surely going to be inundated for the next week on 9/11 anniversary stories. It's going to get "all 9/11 up in here". News organizations far and wide are in planning meetings as we speak. But Sam Hudzik got the jump on what our current President was doing in Chicago when 9/11 happened. Fascinating. Also, a great headline. Read it like Chuck Goudie:

Where was President Obama on September 11th, 2001?

C story: Holy cow! Herb Kent "The Cool Gent" was the guest DJ on Eight Forty-Eight. If you don't listen to Kent's show on Sundays on V-103, you aren't from here. Herbbiee baby!

D story: I have a conundrum in my household. My wifey has soured on my favorite TV show. We both loved Louie (FX, Thursdays) but Julie has faded this season. She doesn't appreciate the dramatic aspects of season 2. Me? I think it's the best thing on TV, ever. I really think Louie should get an Emmy. In last night's episode, Louie takes in his sister's 13 year old daughter. It's not funny, but it's so real. That's why I think it's good.

Weather: So hot.

Sports: The Bears didn't really play anybody of worth last night. But the big story is that star linebacker Lance Briggs is formally asking for a trade. This will be the second time in his Chicago Bear lifetime that Briggs has asked for a trade. If I remember correctly, it was right after the Super Bowl season and the rumors were Briggs for McNabb. Now, Briggs wants more money (again) and is kind of holding the upcoming 2012 season hostage. As fans, this is not what we want to see. And this is the second time we've seen it. I hate to say it because I love me some Lance Briggs, but trade his ass.

Kicker: Did you see the new Schadenfreude web-series, "The New Bleacher Bums?" We released a new episode yesterday following Henneman's boyfriend, Todd Voorhies. Yes, he's a Wrigleyville Regular. And he's super bummed about Zambrano: