WBEZ 91.5 Chicago

Need some music to brighten your day? I DJ'ed last night at Dance Dance Party Party.

This whole mix began with me playing "The Humpty Dance" and remembering what a fun song it is. I went into a '90s happy rap/R&B wormhole, going back to some of my favorite songs from late middle school and early high school. Ironically, "Humpty Dance" didn't make the cut because it's six and a half minutes long, which is too long for a DDPP mix (in my opinion.) The last minute especially of the song feels unnecessary.

This is from one of the first tapes I ever bought. En Vogue was just the coolest, you know? So gorgeous and empowered and talented. You know how one of Beyonce's latest songs tell people to bow down?

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When I was a kid there were only two FM radio stations I could have on when my parents were driving me around: oldies or classical. I chose oldies.

I've found myself listening to the oldies channel on Pandora when hanging out with the baby, based on nostalgia and the songs' basic sing-a-long formation. Maybe it's been a while since I listened to these tunes, because I'm a little shocked now by some of the old songs that have always been my favorites.

Obviously with pinning, going steady and sock hops, oldies evoke charmingly retro, bygone era. I used to see these as innocent tunes, ideal to listen to as you and your main squeeze drank a milkshake via two straws. But now I realize the tableaus these songs paint aren't always so rosy, at least if you're a woman. To wit:

Runaround Sue is about slut-shaming:

Dion's cautionary tale about a cheating girl is certainly enjoyable, with its nonsense word chorus. But what's the theme, exactly? Telling everyone on earth that not only did his ex-girlfriend cheat on him, she did it with "every single guy in town." Hyperbole much? Later on in the song Dion sings, "Sue goes out with other guys." Well, that makes things more complicated.

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Follow me on Twitter @Zulkey

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In February I made the bold proclamation that I'd give up drinking for Lent. I'm proud to say that aside from a few shots of Nyquil from when I wasn't feeling well, I made it through the entire season. I was fairly certain I'd learn a few things about my relationship with alcohol and my own body during this time and I did. In that I didn't.

1. Giving up drinking was easier than I expected. Just saying "I gave up drinking for Lent" out loud helped establish what I was doing and nobody questioned it in social settings. I confirmed that I can go out with friends and have a good time drinking Diet Coke and not wine. It was a lot cheaper, too.

2. But it also never got any easier over the long haul. I figured the longer I went without liquor the less I would miss it, but that was not the case. On Friday nights, especially, at the end of a long week, I badly missed unwinding with my husband in the kitchen over some wine. Even in the last days of Lent I had to give myself pep talks, saying what a shame it would be to come that far just to blow it.

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Today I speak with beloved blogger Jen Larsen, whose recently-published memoir Stranger Here details her experience losing almost 200 pounds via surgery – and her discovery that weight loss is not a magic bullet for happiness.

Larsen was the featured blogger at Condé Nast's now-defunct Elastic Waist, and her columns have been syndicated on Yahoo!'s Shine Network for Women. She is a contributor to Big Fat Deal, a blog about weight in popular culture. Her work has appeared in Strange Horizons, Word Riot, Emprise Review, and South Loop Review, among other publications. You can read a lot more about and from her here.

Why did you use a pseudonym when writing for Elastic Waist?

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Let's be real: Pasta Madness has been a lot more exciting and fun than actual March Madness. No matter who you are, your bracket has been completely busted to hell by now and your favorite team has probably already long been eliminated. But pasta will always be there for you. Even when your team loses you still win, because, pasta.

Let's look at the latest games:

Linguine vs. Gemelli. Linguine's got a lot going for it and really nothing is wrong with it, per se, but Gemelli just has more. Gemelli is, by definition, twin pastas, and two of something great is always going to have an edge over just one. It's like, would you rather have one beautiful wife or two? Plus, as a short pasta, Gemelli is a more female-friendly pasta because you can just fork it up, as opposed to worrying about splattering one of your top three most embarrassing places on your body, like you would with linguine. I know I'm sort of like the Ken "Hawk" Harrelson when it comes to Gemelli: I've been a fan since day one and am not ashamed of it. Well, deal with it. I'm here to cheer for Gemelli until they fire me. Winner: Gemelli.

Pappardelle vs. Farfalle. This game is a little bit like what happens when the snobby rich kids (pappardelle) play the down-and-out scrappy kids from the other side of the tracks. Only in this case, the rich kids win because they're better in every way.

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The secret to Chicago is not getting through winter: It’s being able to withstand spring.

Winter might be colder, but big picture, it doesn’t feel that long due to the holidays. You have New Year’s, then Valentine’s Day, then Martin Luther King Jr. Day, and before you know it’s March and it’s spring. Whee, right? Lambs springing about, daffodils poking through the ground, delicious new-season produce, sunshine!

Not so fast.

You most likely live here so you know what happened the first day of spring. Something that looks like this:

And ever since that day it’s been the same, over and over again: gray and tedious, the weather equivalent of an orange you spent a lot of time peeling that turned out to be dry, bitter and tasteless.

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