News Headline: "Is Obama vulnerable on the economy?"
News Headline: "Will Romney lurch to center?"
News Headline: "Can Tea Party maintain clout through election and beyond?"
News Headline: "Do early polls mean anything?"
News Headline: "Is there hope for a third party?"
News Headline: "Is Obama losing the super PAC war?"
News Headline: "Will young voters steal the show in 2012?"
Yes, yes, no, no, no, yes, no.
See how easy?
The Case for Zero Tolerance of Modern School Administrators:
Memorial High School in Houston, Texas, has named 31 valedictorians.
News Headline: "India to launch Mars mission."
For those wondering where our next tech support calls will be routed.
News Headline: "Obama campaign: We won't talk about Romney's Mormonism."
News Headline: "Romney rejects plan to use Obama's ex-pastor against him."
Good for both campaigns.
These are important promises.
And rest assured: Neither campaign will rest until every voter understands exactly what won't be said further about the other.
Is Taste of NATO over yet?
Gene Janowski, a Chicago reader, wants to know:
Can it really be only 32 days until the Chicago Gay Pride Parade, which starts at noon June 24 and heads east on Montrose to Broadway, south on Broadway to Halsted, south on Halsted to Belmont, east on Belmont to Broadway, south on Broadway to Diversey and east on Diversey to Cannon Drive, so mark your calendars?
We Have Seen the Present, and It Does Not Work:
A Wayne County, Mich., groundskeeper who found a loaded gun while out mowing the grass turned the gun in to his employers and was immediately fired for possession of a weapon on work property.
News Headline: "Still no GOP health care plan."
Yet another misleading headline from the mainstream media.
Of course there is a GOP health care plan.
Bring out your dead!
Bring out your dead!
Phil Halprin, a Schaumburg reader, writes:
"I can't foresee a president who is named after a catcher's glove."
And could this be why he is afraid to stray from the Republican base?
QT Summer Travel Advisory:
The Crawford County Fair rabbit and pig scramble will conflict with the Warren County Fair goat weigh-in on July 24.
News Headline: "2012 campaign shaped by ads and slogans."
News Headline: "The dumbing down of American politics."
Or wait. Think back to the politics of many years ago.
This is the text from a TV ad that ran in 1952 for presidential candidate Dwight D. Eisenhower:
"Ike for president. Ike for president. Ike for president. Ike for president. You like Ike. I like Ike. Everybody likes Ike–for president. Hang out the banner. Beat the drums. We'll take Ike to Washington. We don't want John or Dean or Harry. Let's do that big job right. Let's get in step with the guy that's hep. Get in step with Ike. You like Ike. I like Ike. Everybody likes Ike–for president. Hang out the banners. Beat the drums. We'll take Ike to Washington. We've got to get where we are going. Travel day and night. But Adlai goes the other way. We'll all go with Ike. You like Ike. I like Ike. Everybody likes Ike–for president. Hang out the banner. Beat the drums. We'll take Ike to Washington."
So sometimes things aren't as bad as they seem.
Then again, not often.
Newth Headline: "Tongue thtudth can cauthe tooth gapth."
Newth Headline: "Tongue thtudth blamed for mouth infectionth."
Newth Headline: "Tongue thtudth can altho increathe rithkth of brain abtheth."
Jutht how many warningth do our youngthterth need?
From the QT Archive of Knowledge:
+ It takes 3 million fasteners to hold together a Boeing 747.
+ Stegosauruses liked to eat rocks.
From Poor QT's Almanack:
On this day in history 394 years ago occurred the Defenestration of Prague, during which Protestant nobles threw two Roman Catholic governors out of a high window at the Royal Palace and into a dung heap, leading to the Thirty Years' War, which, come to think of it, was 86 years shorter than the Hundred Years' War, but we can deal with that another time.
QT Grammar R Us Seminar on the English Language:
T.C., a San Antonio, Texas, reader, wants you to know that in matters of cooking, a pinch is smaller than a dash.
And a smidgen is smaller than a pinch.
"Immense" is larger than "enormous," by the way.
QT appears Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays.
Write to QT at firstname.lastname@example.org.