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This week the Machete welcomes Chicago fiction legend Stuart Dybek, as well as special musical guest Canasta. And, of course, trusted Machete Avian Op-Ed columnist Chad the Bird (the creation of Crash Pad puppeteer Josh Zagoren) will be holding court behind the bar of the Horseshoe.

Before Daylight Savings ended, there was a whole lotta trouble, starting with Samantha Irby, who paints Herman Cain as the lady killer he is. Cayne Collier becomes a gastroenterologist who educates us on fecal transplants (a real thing!).

You know Halloween is still in the air, because the candy corn hasn't run out. For this Very Special Halloween episode, we have a Very Special Guest Host, Josh Zagoren. Adam Guerino claims Halloween is the new gay holiday.

This was just a big, big news week, so Chad the Bird recaps it for you. Matt Klingler plays Terrence McCarthy, who talks about the cancellation of The Playboy Club. James Porter weighs in on the Hank Williams Jr. Hitler controversy. Katie Rich gives election advice to single ladies.