WBEZ | LGBTQ

'God is not a bully' spreads message of love to LGBTQ people

Wed, 19 Jun 2013 00:10:00 -0500

When I came out in my church I was 16 and still wearing ascots for ties. I was a mop of hair looking for guidance in the faith that had given me a home. I chose to be a Baptist because of its overt grounding in community and its personalism over the Latin coldness of my mother’s Catholicism. Being a Baptist was a call to dance, and there can’t be a revolution without dancing.

Then I was called into the Pastor’s office. He gave me a choice. I could choose either my “desires” or my religion. The church could never be a home for my perversion.

But it wasn’t just God’s flock that was after me. God himself was waiting for me—with a sniper rifle. The Pastor told me about the high rates of HIV, depression, suicide and death from drug use in the gay community as empirical evidence of divine wrath.

“God’s waiting to cut you down,” he claimed. “And he’ll get you eventually, when you least expect it.”

I left the church, where I’d been renowned for my poetry. I even placed in a national competition for it, but I felt like that voice would never be heard. I hugged the people who loved me goodbye, the ones who vocally supported my coming out. They felt like I could make a difference.

However, the pastor’s hate spoke louder. I wasn’t strong enough yet to let Him hate me, so I gave him up. I closed the door.

A new movement is working to tear down the barriers to entry for those who have been excluded from the church and told they didn’t fit the definition of God’s love. God Is Not a Bully is a video project in which LGBTQ people share the message that “God is love, not hate” by telling their personal experiences of religion and finding embrace for exactly who they are, all of it.

“I know that the bullying rhetoric of religion and of people in power in the Church has a devastating effect on queer people,” Cathy Knight, the project’s Executive Director, said. “Young people in particular look up to clergy folks, believe what they say as authority as they develop their own belief system. When clergy espouse that LGBTQ people are an abomination and a sin, that message is internalized. The shame and heartache begins.”

For Knight, this speaks to her own journey as a person of faith, where she and many of her friends struggled with the pain that comes from feeling like you have nowhere to belong.

“I attended United Methodist Churches for years, hearing the annual sermon that I was a sinner because of my sexual orientation," Knight said. “The confusion of the message and how I felt about myself had to be numbed out. I turned to drugs to stay sane. I was a drug addict, but I kept going to church.”

She found spiritual guidance by discovering a congregation that affirmed multiplicity of identities, where she could be an out lesbian who also followed the message of Jesus Christ. Knight believes that there’s an internal struggle within the church right now toward opening the doors and closing the windows, where the Pope can say that atheists can be good people and go to heaven but the institution of the church retracts it.

“It’s hard to change something that often doesn’t want to change,” Knight said.

God Is Not a Bully doesn’t hope to change religion, but provide a resource for its queer followers.

Anna DeShawn, the founder of E3 Radio and a collaborator on the project, says that many single out queer people for marginalization by highlighting the Clobber scriptures—or the Bible verses devoted to condemning homosexuality—and taking a literal interpretation.

“They’re used to control people,” DeShawn said. “If we did that for every verse in the Bible, we wouldn’t eat meat and we would be sacrificing sons.”

DeShawn hopes that sharing the stories will challenge the restrictive messages of hate and reclaim God by changing the conversation.

“We embarked upon this project to uplift and encourage young people who are struggling with their sexuality and their faith,” DeShawn said. “The stories that have been shared are real and my hope is that the message will touch the hearts of those that watch."

In a video on the project's website, Emily McConnell discusses her own personal understanding of religion as a child, inspired by her diverse upbringing.

“I didn’t agree with any fundamentalist idea of God,” McConnell said. “I didn’t agree with anybody who told me that any group of people were automatically condemned for something they didn’t have a choice in."

Instead McConnell understood God as “universal” and his love as “extending to those of all kinds.”

“Any kind of sexuality [is] a gift from God,” she argued.

You can find McConnell’s story along with those of others on the God Is Not a Bully website. The campaign will post videos throughout the month of June for pride month.

Their videos won’t open every window to religion. But for queer religious people struggling in the dark like I was, they offer some much needed light.

Nico Lang writes about LGBTQ issues in Chicago. You can follow Nico on Facebook, Twitter or Tumblr.

Want to get back at the politicans who denied marriage equality?

Thu, 06 Jun 2013 09:23:00 -0500

The failure of the Illinois state legislature to pass the marriage equality bill has certain folks suggesting payback for those elected officials at, of all misguided and silly things, the annual Pride Parade coming up June 30. There’s even a petition over at Change.org asking that politicians be denied entry into the parade. It’s already garnered more than 1,800 signatures.

But as Tracey Baim very reasonably explains in a current editorial in Windy City Times, it’s a questionable tactic. For starters, the only two state reps who are registered to participate are Greg Harris and Sarah Feigenholtz. Denying them would actually be denying ourselves.

And, anyway, it’s too late: the Parade is set, whomever was going to come and party with us decided to do so before the vote on marriage equality. Want to make a political calculation out of the parade? Count the absences, then cross reference them with the promises we’ve been hearing this last year.

Over at the Reader, Ben Joravsky makes some salient observations about the vote: It boils down to House Speaker Michael Madigan and Mayor Rahm Emanuel suckering the LGBTQ community for bucks and votes in exchange for their “concern” and “support.”

As Joravsky explains, there’s a Democratic majority, with a sitting governor who’s promised to sign the marriage equality bill, and a speaker whose better known as the Great and Powerful Oz. The math doesn’t add up, especially when you factor in the passing of Emanuel’s pet project, the $300 million giveaway to the Catholic Church at McCormick Place. I’m referring to the new DePaul stadium, a project announced and passed in less than a month’s time, with barely a breath for citizens to respond.

Think about that and the years it’s taken to bring marriage equality up for consideration. Think about the kind of power that can put that kind of deal together in such a blink of the eye but then chooses to sit on its hands for marriage equality.

Michael Madigan and Rahm Emanuel both claim to be strong LGBTQ supporters.

So what happened?

Joravsky suggests that keeping the LGBTQ community on the precipice of equality means we keep giving to make it happen. A personal ATM, that’s what he says we are to Madigan and Emanuel.

And I don’t think he’s wrong.

But I also think there’s a different deal going down, and it’s less about us and more about Madigan. By denying Gov. Pat Quinn important legislative victories—same-sex marriage, pension reform—he’s setting the stage to run daughter Lisa against him.

Some activists recently called for holding Lisa Madigan responsible based precisely on this reasoning. That too would be disappointing: We don’t visit the sins of the fathers on their children in this country, and Lisa Madigan has been an unwavering—and real—supporter.

And some even called for Harris—the gay Representative who led the pro-marriage charge—to pay a price for backing away from calling a vote. Madness, if you ask me. Has anyone been more dedicated?

Want to get back at those state legislators who actually screwed us? Don’t vote for them. Don’t vote for their acolytes. Don’t vote for Emanuel, no matter how chiseled and flirty he is at the next big gay event. Keep your hands in your pockets and don’t give a dime to any of them.

Want to get some respect? Stop playing the spurned lover.

Construction begins on Midwest’s first affordable housing for LGBTQ seniors

Mon, 03 Jun 2013 16:03:00 -0500

Construction vehicles knocked down walls at a building in Lakeview Monday to prepare for what will soon become the region’s first LGBTQ-friendly senior affordable housing development.

The $26 million dollar development will occupy a part of the old 23rd district Town Hall police station on Halsted and Addison streets, as well as the now-vacant space next to it. The building will be home to 79 studio and one-bedroom apartments, as well as a space for community programming run by The Center on Halsted.

The development has been in the works for a while. By Lakeview Ald. Tom Tunney’s count, he’s been working on the issue for at least 10 years. Tunney, one of the first openly gay Chicago aldermen, says the work won’t stop once the center opens.

“The selection process is going to be interesting because the demand is gonna be amazing,” Tunney said. “And getting it open and learning in general how to integrate the community center with the housing component, I think there’s gonna be a few challenges there.”

Some Chicagoans have already voiced interest in living in the building. Tom Genley said the senior center would be a safe zone, and thus he was eyeing one of the apartments.

“Here, because I can be me, an out gay man. Here, because I do not have to hide my true self,” Genley said. “Here, because the closet is for clothes.”

But alongside the celebration and hard-hat photo-ops was an air of disappointment over the Illinois House of Representatives’ decision not to call a vote on a bill to legalize same-sex marriage. During her remarks about the housing project, Representative Sara Feigenholtz called the last weekend of the legislative session one where a lot of “broken dreams happened.”

“We just didn’t quite get it done yet,” Feigenholtz said. “But we’re gonna go back and we’re gonna get it done.”

Democratic state Rep. Greg Harris of Chicago decided not to call a House floor vote on the bill that would've made Illinois the 13th state to allow gay marriage. Harris said he didn't have the votes but also vowed to bring back the issue.

The Center on Halsted has been working with The Heartland Alliance, a local anti-poverty organization, state and city officials on the financing and construction for the affordable housing development. All 79 units will be subsidized, and will cost no more than 30 percent of a given resident’s income. Construction on the building is scheduled to be completed by the fall of 2014.

Lauren Chooljian is WBEZ’s Morning Producer/Reporter. Follow her @laurenchooljian.

The Kate Hunt saga

Mon, 27 May 2013 10:40:00 -0500

The deadline came Friday and Kate Hunt, the Florida 18 year-old accused of "lewd and lascivious battery on a child 12 to 16 years-old," rejected a plea deal offer by the state’s attorney, meaning the case goes to trial June 20.

The deal would have meant two years of house arrest, one year of probation and a conviction of child abuse (rather than be required to register as a sex offender for life). It would have, in effect, kept Hunt from going to college and likely ended any chance she could ever have a career involving minors, including her choice of nursing. In other words: Hunt would have been stigmatized for life.

When news broke of the case – a pair of high school Juliets apparently caught in the web of homophobia and laws aimed at adult predators of minor children – there was a wave of sympathy for Hunt, whose family has come out in force to defend her, creating a Facebook page to explain their side, raising funds for a legal defense, and selling “Free Kate” t-shirts to that end.

But in the last week or so, at least two events have caused some reconsideration. Those include the decision by the state’s attorney and sheriff’s office to release the arrest affidavit (which includes details of both sexual acts and, in its dry clinical language, actually reads like the worst pornography – and, no, I’m not going to link it: it’s easy enough to find) as well as recordings from a taped conversation between the two girls, and the decision of her younger girlfriend’s family to finally speak to the press.

Not surprisingly, the families tell different stories. These events seemed to have affected the some folks, even over at Daily Kos, who’d originally come out strong for Hunt, and woulnd up taking back a petition supporting her. (A petition at Change.org continues full steam ahead).

From everything I can tell, here’s the story:

* There is a three-year, seven-month difference in age between Hunt and the younger girl.

* They met at school, where they were classmates and peers because the younger girl is in an International Baccalaureate program. They were also on the varsity basketball team together. In the arrest affidavit, Hunt says she didn’t think about the age difference because the girl acted older. The younger girl is actually taller and looks older than Hunt.

* The relationship began sometime in the fall, when Hunt was 18 and the girl was 14. They had sex twice: once in a school bathroom (this really seems to get some people because it sounds so lurid but – seriously – is this that far-fetched for a pair of high school kids?) and another time at Hunt’s house, after the girl ran away from home and Hunt went to pick her up.

* The relationship appears to be a first for both girls. Hunt’s mother said she’d only dated boys up until this point. In the recorded phone, Hunt tells the younger girl she’s in love with her.

* Hunt’s mother says she assumed the younger girl’s parents, Jim and Laurie Smith, knew about the relationship. She does not describe Hunt as a lesbian – she considers the relationship a normal part of teen experimentation – but she does accuse the Smiths of being religious anti-gay zealots. She says they should have come to their family first before going to the authorities to deal with the matter between families. At one point, she also sad the Smiths waited until Hunt turned 18 to get her arrested, an accusation which appears to be contradicted by the arrest warrant.

* The Smiths say the same sex issue is not their concern, that it’s the age difference (something they might have given some thought to before signing off on their daughter’s IB matriculation). They also say they twice warned Hunt to stay away from their daughter (which means that either Hunt didn’t share this with her family, or her mother deliberately ignores it in the retelling, or it never happened). They also blame Hunt for their daughter’s running away. They claim they went to authorities when all else proved futile.

* I can’t find anything about the Smith’s religious affiliations but the State’s Attorney on the case, Bruce Colton, who claims this is not a LGBTQ issue, is a Republican who was endorsed by Christian voting groups in the last election. Colton also recently dropped similar charges against another 18 year-old girl in a case involving a 15 year-old girl, so why he seems to be doubling down on Hunt is somewhat of a mystery.

* Hunt’s mother says Hunt was kicked out of high school, in spite of two judges orders allowing her to stay, because the Smiths pressed the school board. There may be some truth to that, but it’s also true that sex in school bathrooms is against the school’s student code and may be at least, the technical reason for her expulsion.

* The Hunts have been careful to insist the younger girl is not cooperating and has said the relationship is consensual. But the younger girl has no legal right to consent in Florida. And she has either cooperated or been coerced into cooperation in both the arrest affidavit and the recorded phone call. She’ll be called to the stand during the trial, though her testimony may not be necessary for conviction: Hunt admitted both sexual encounters to the arresting officer after she was Mirandized. Hunt could get as much as 15 years in jail and be required to register as a sex offender.

* There is a chance that, even if convicted, Hunt could apply to have her record expunged under Florida’s “Romeo & Juliet” law, which erases convictions when the partners have less than a four year age difference. In the meantime, a Republican state senator, Thad Altman, has said he’ll introduce a bill that will ease matters for high schoolers caught up in laws aimed at adult child predators.

All of which brings me back to my original take on this story: It seems like a fairly typical high school romance blown completely out of proportion, particularly by the parents.

First, the Smiths: it seems, they don’t seem to know much about what their daughter is up to (they found out about the relationship from the basketball coach, who told Mrs. Smith, an assistant to the coach). They didn’t seem to have given much thought to what having their daughter attend school with older kids might mean – older kids, let’s be honest, right smack in the midst of sexual discovery. I am also mystified they didn’t seek out the Hunts in trying to keep things under control. Their warnings to Hunt seems to ignore that their daughter sought out Hunt when she ran away.

What is the relationship with their own daughter? Kids don’t run away without a reason. Everybody in Indian River nows who their daughter is now, and would have known even without the Hunts’ media campaign. How smart was it to expose her to all that? And is putting their kid on the witness stand against her girlfriend a good idea – I don’t mean legally, I mean psychologically? While I’m sure a sexually active 14 year-old can be unnerving to parents regardless of orientation, I’m not convinced by any of the Smiths’ public statements – all very gay neutral – that they aren’t particularly freaked out by their daughter’s same sex attraction. They say they want to hold Hunt responsible and don’t want her to do jail time. But they have also rejected Hunt’s offer to leave the state and never contact their daughter. What do they want then? It’s unclear.

And second, the Hunts: I get their crazy-over-the-top protect-my-baby above all things campaign. I get her legal defense is an extraordinary expenditure they didn’t anticipate and that they need help. I admire the unconditional support they’re giving their child. But the campaign has also been a Pandora’s Box. The Hunts, I’m sure, didn’t anticipate the details of their daughter’s tryst would be splashed in newspapers all over the world. They’ve also created a public gay persona for Hunt which may or may not mirror her actual sexual identity. Even if somehow Hunt gets off, or the charges are reduced to a misdemeanor, this story will follow her forever.

In other words, both of these girls will need a long, long recovery from this ordeal.

Hate is in the air: LGBTQ setbacks

Tue, 21 May 2013 14:10:00 -0500

Sometimes, there are reminders. Indications that, yes, the arch of justice bends... and sometimes breaks. Here we are, poised maybe before the queer equivalent of the Dred Scott decision at the Supreme Court (if anybody was listening to Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg at the University of Chicago law school a few weeks back, you know the court’s rulings on DOMA/Prop 8 are not going to be Brown) and hate—individual, societal, institutional—can still rear its gnarly head and wreck a life or two or three.

Consider:

*Earlier this month, a Texas judge enforced a so-called "morality clause" in the divorce decree between Carolyn Compton and her ex-husband, effectively destroying her current same-sex relationship. How’s that? Well, the clause, which is pretty common in Texas divorces though rarely enforced, demands that Compton—a grown woman—not be allowed to have anyone she’s dating or intimate with and who is not related by blood or marriage in her home after 9 p.m.

That’s right: the judge gave Compton, the mother of two, a curfew—and essentially forced her partner of three years, Page Price, to move out of the home they’ve shared. Why? Because the state of Texas’ laws not only ban same-sex marriage but affect collateral legalities, such as power of attorney, child custody, etc. In other words, Texas laws dictate pretty much every aspect of their private lives. The demand for the enforcement came from Compton’s former husband of 11 years, a man who’s been stalking and harassing her enough in the last few years to have earned a protective order and a guilty plea for criminal trespassing.

*Then there’s the case of Kaitlyn Hunt, a Florida high school senior who’s been charged with "lewd and lascivious battery of a child 12-16 years old." The story is best told by Hunt’s mother, who started a Facebook page in her daughter’s defense:

"Voted the student with ‘Most School Spirit’ by her peers, Kaitlyn was an active cheerleader, a basketball player, a camp counselor and cheering coach, and a medical assistant training to join the nursing program at Valencia College after graduation. She looked forward to a career helping others and a memorable final year of high school. At the beginning of the school year, Kaitlyn made friends with a 14-year-old freshmen girl in Sebastian River High's IB program who played varsity sports and took classes with upper classmen. The girls were peers in the same social circle, and as happens every day high schools across America, their friendship eventually developed into more. In September, shortly after Kaitlyn's 18th birthday, the girls began dating, and they eventually expressed their affection for one another in intimate ways.When the girls' basketball coach found out that two of her players were dating, she kicked Kaitlyn off the team and informed her girlfriend's parents that their daughter was in a same-sex relationship. The parents then conspired with police to entrap Kaitlyn and press charges.The police recorded a phone conversation between the two girls, who today are 18 and 15, in which they discussed their relationship. Kaitlyn was arrested and charged with two counts of felony lewd and lascivious battery on a child 12-16. Kaitlyn's girlfriend denies that Kaitlyn ever pressured her and is adamant that their relationship is entirely consensual, but her parents are out to destroy Kaitlyn's life. After two separate judges ruled that Kaitlyn could finish her senior year with her peers, her girlfriend's parents appealed to the Indian River County School Board, who expelled Kaitlyn and sent her to the alternative school."

One great thing going for Hunt: Her mom. Family support can make all the difference. But should a high school girl—a girl who was obviously a good and popular student—ever have to go through something like this?

*Lastly, there’s New York City. One of the safest, most accepting places for queer people. Or is it? Last Saturday, a fool with a gun put a bullet into Mark Carson’s face and shot him dead, just blocks from the iconic Stonewall Inn, site of one of Gay Liberation’s most well-known freedom riot. Let me be perfectly clear: this happened in the heart of Greenwich Village, where the sight of same-sex couples holding hands and being affectionate is as common as ... well, opposite sex couples. Fifteen hundred people marched in the Village Monday night chanting Carson’s name. But later that same night, Dan Contarino, another openly gay man, was bashed at Avenue D and 4th Street.

What’s going on here? An uncomfortable heat, hate’s penultimate gasp.

Worldview: Gay rights in Russia and corruption in India

Mon, 20 May 2013 11:54:00 -0500

Fierce & Fabulous: A new look at the Ebony Fashion Fair

Thu, 16 May 2013 15:31:00 -0500

Explore how African American and LGBT histories mix through fashion, influenced by the famed Ebony Fashion Fair. Curator Joy Bivins, ball culture historian Marlon Bailey, and couture designer Tommy Walton look at style and personal expression from different points of view, from fierce to fabulous!

Recorded live Thursday, May 16, 2013 at the Chicago History Museum.

The absurdity of Tim Tebow vs. Jason Collins

Fri, 03 May 2013 05:52:00 -0500

You may have seen this tweet, or a variation, in the last few days:

Tim Tebow: I’m Christian.
Media: Keep it to yourself!
Jason Collins: I’m gay.
Media: This man’s a hero!

Oh, the self-pity, the false equivalency!

Both men became free agents in their respective sports recently, both making news, but that's about where the similarity in their situations begin and end.

Yet Tebow's fans seem all bent out of shape that their man—long known as a Christian—didn't get the kinds of love Collins provoked by revealing his homosexuality.

Can we just review?

Tebow is part of an American majority: A straight Christian male.

Collins is part of several American and global minorities: An African-American gay male.

Tebow has all the rights of our Constitution – including the right to marry, to have his children instantly recognized as his, to attend the church of his choice, to be as proudly heterosexual as he’d like – that is, publicly holding hands, kissing, etc. There is a complete, undisputed right to religious freedom in this country. There is a complete undisputed right to heterosexuality in this country. Tebow can’t be denied housing, employment, or any other right simply for being a Christian or heterosexual.

In other words, proclaiming his Christianity or his virginal heterosexuality does not in any way involve stakes for Tebow. There is no risk in being a straight Christian.

Collins has limited rights as a gay man – depending entirely on where he’s standing. In Massachusetts and several other states, he can marry if he wants and he’s protected from discrimination in hiring and lodging and most quotidian activities.

But that’s not the case for Collins in, say, in Jacksonville, Florida, where Tebow grew up. In fact, in Jacksonville, the City Council specifically rejected adding protections for LGBT people less than a year ago – refusing to amend the city’s Human Rights Ordinance, a bill that already protects residents based on race, color, sex, marital status, national origin, age, disability or religion.

The folks who led the charge in Jacksonville? Christian folk like Tebow, who take their rights so for granted they can lead their lives without ever worrying if they can put their partner on their health insurance, if they’ll still have that health insurance if their bosses find out who their partner is, or if they’ll get asked to leave a restaurant for reaching across the dinner table to hold hands with their mate.

Christian folk who apparently fail to notice Jesus said nada about homosexuality and prefer to cherry pick their way through the Old Testament for their condemnations.

Give me a break!

And while I have no idea what Tebow thinks of his hometown’s ordinance, I know he gave a speech at Liberty University this year, the school founded by Jerry Falwell, which explicitly prohibits the enrollment of openly gay students.

(Is there a single queer institution that bans Christians? If there is, I don’t know about it.)

From the comparisons being made between Collins – the very first ever gay male athlete in a major league sport to come out – we might think Tebow was also breaking some kind of grounds as an out and proud Christian player.

But let’s not forget Kurt Warner, who lead the Cardinals to a Super Bowl while wearing Jesus on his sleeve. Or former Washington Redskins coach Joe Gibbs, who used to pray on the sidelines. Or former Seattle Seahawk Shaun Alexander. Or Indianapolis Colts kicker Hunter Smith. Or Atlanta Falcons kicker Jason Elam, who wrote a Christian-based novel called “Monday Night Jihad.” And those are just the football players.

What drives people nuts about Tebow is not that he's Christian but the constant Christian-in-your-face gestures – the kneeling, the scripture written on his cheeks, the anti-abortion Super Bowl ad.

Say what you will about Collins, up until this point, his sexuality has been completely inobtrusive. If he suddenly starts grabbing his crotch, writing Gertrude Stein verses on his face, or appearing in smoochy pro-gay Super Bowl ads, he could wear his welcome out as quickly as Tebow.

The reason Collins is getting the pats on the back now, the presidential call and the media high fives is because what he did still involves risks – he has given up a life of presumed heterosexuality, with all its attendant privileges, to accept the life of an openly gay man, with all its joys and limitations.

Sure, he could play blissfully protected in New York or Boston, but — now that he’s out of the closet — what about Memphis? Or Atlanta? The Orlando Magic could, for all intents and purposes, point to Florida’s anti-sodomy law (technically unenforceable but still on the books) and say, Hey, we don’t want to hire somebody who’s gonna come in and break the law.

People may not like Tebow – just like they may not like Collins – but Tebow is never, ever, going to experience anything even close to that.

PREVIOUS STORY: Why Jason Collins' coming out matters

Why Jason Collins' coming out is so meaningful

Tue, 30 Apr 2013 12:33:00 -0500

When I was in 20s, my queer friends and I had a phone tree. One of the most fun excuses to call was when a gay character would pop on TV. These were like rare birds or comets. There was a certain delight in seeing them, even when they were terribly written or acted, or when their ultimate effect was negative. For us, who rarely saw ourselves reflected in the flickering light of media ordinariness, seeing another member of our species in almost any circumstance was an affirmation that we existed, that we were, in fact, everywhere, however covertly.

I was thinking about those times again after reading Jason Collins’ moving coming out story in Sports Illustrated. We live at a time when queer people have never been more ubiquitous in media and out in the world. However unequal we may in fact be, we’ve never been more equal. But Collins' description of life in the NBA closet harkened back to a darker and lonelier time, a time when the stakes of being found out could be life-altering and devastating.

It reminded me too of those years when Martina Navratilova ruled the tennis world and we – gaggles of lesbians, including many like myself who weren’t particularly interested in tennis – would flock to see her perform. Why did we go? Because one of us had reached a pinnacle, because it was important to support her. Especially important since Navratilova, one of the very first pro athletes ever to come out, was hounded by the media and actually brought to tears by the relentlessness inquisition and barbs.

That particular episode made a hero of her friend and rival, Chris Evert, the tennis golden girl she stole the crown from. Evert admonished everybody to leave her friend alone. Evert demonstrated the importance of allies with words, but there was something more significant in her actions: She draped her arm around Martina and showed queerness didn’t rub off.

And we, the gay gals in the stands, understood something else was at play too. With every inch that Martina won for herself, she was advancing the cause of tolerance. And every time Evert draped that arm over her shoulder, it was less extraordinary, less brave – precisely because it had been so brave that first time – and more and more a common sight at countless Grand Slams. It was weird not to see them together, so much had they become the norm. And, sure, because Martina was such a towering figure – because she reshaped and redefined women’s tennis – she was indisputable.

Navratilova wrote an accompanying piece to Collins’ in which she makes an important point: hers was an individual sport. She was either good enough or she wasn’t. No one could keep her off the court but herself. With Collins, in a team sport in which personnel decisions aren’t made by players, a prejudiced coach or owner could keep a player off the court. Jason Collins’ position was more precarious.

And yet Collins, deep in the closet, felt compelled to reach out with symbolic identification, a move so covert I’m not sure anyone outside his most immediate circle understood it. He wore 98 on his uniform, in honor of 1998, the year Matthew Shepard, a young gay man was murdered in horrific and inhumane fashion.

That may seem an odd choice for identification. Collins is a titan, Shepard like a baby bird. But it may say something about how vulnerable Collins has felt all his life. And, of course, what an incredibly important step his coming out is. And how important all the media, league and political support is. It's Chris Evert’s arm multiplied by thousands.

When I read through the reactions to Collins’ announcement and see the inevitable reader comment suggesting the revelation of sexual orientation shouldn’t be news, I agree. But until there are no Matthew Shepards, saying you’re anything but heteronormative is still an act of courage.

And the fact that Jason Collins – roommates with a Kennedy, earning more than $1 million a year, and possessing the physical powers to dispatch any street bully – was still afraid, means that, yes, it’s still news.

NBA star's coming out reveals double standard in sports

Tue, 30 Apr 2013 09:11:00 -0500

Billie Jean King. Martina Navratilova. Sheryl Swoopes. Natasha Kai. Megan Rapinoe. Sue Wicks. Rosie Jones. Michelle Van Gorp. Amber Harris. Jessica Adair. Liz Carmouche. Stacy Sekora. Seimone Augustus.

What do all of these women have in common? They are all out professional athletes, just like Jason Collins.

King and Navratilova became the world’s first out sports stars over 30 years ago, at a time when homosexuality was still classified by the American Psychiatric Association as a mental disorder. King won 12 Grand Slam titles in her long career, a laudable feat for any athlete.

To be taken seriously, King didn’t just have to prove she was the best female player. She had to prove she was the best, period. When she beat Bobby Riggs, the headlines claimed she “won for all women.”

But how far have we come since 1973? Here’s an experiment: Name ten female athletes currently playing team sports professionally. I’d wager more of you can name ten male players.

Can you name five WNBA teams? Neither can I.

Do you know who Brittney Griner is? I didn’t until a couple weeks ago.

Griner was the No. 1 pick in the WNBA draft, after making her name as one of the most dominant college basketball players in history. After being drafted by the Phoenix Mercury, Griner came out. Nike offered an endorsement to the first out professional athlete after holding an LGBT sports summit last June. The Internet was abuzz about who might use the deal to come out.

When Nike offered it to Griner, the announcement (like her coming out) was an anticlimax.

Imagine if a male basketball star of Griner’s stature came out. If Lebrón James or Dwayne Wade revealed they were gay. It would break the Internet. When the former Baylor star came out, the only headlines were about how it “wasn’t that big of a deal.” The New York Times wrote that the sports world collectively "shrugged" at the announcement.

Some called this a step forward and sign that the WNBA’s tolerance. In a profile on Griner, Jay Busbee of Yahoo! Sports wrote.

“That’s [the key]. The ‘younger generation.’ Griner knows that the key to acceptance is through upcoming generations. There are plenty of people still alive who can remember a time before Jackie Robinson, but for the rest of us, the idea of a segregated baseball field is impossible to conceive. An athlete’s sexual orientation shouldn’t be a bigger story than what he or she does on the field. If we’re going to obsess on players’ sexual preferences, Griner’s understated stance, and the resulting acceptance, are the way to go.”

Those are encouraging sentiments, but why hasn’t that message been shared with a wider audience? Why is the fact that Griner’s coming out “wasn’t that big a deal” a bigger deal?

In an interview with the Times, Jim Buzinski, co-founder of OutSports.com, put it bluntly: “Because [she’s] a woman.”

Buzinski said a piece on OutSports speculating that a pro sports player might come out received ten times more traffic than a video of Griner actually coming out as a lesbian.

Less than 24 hours after coming out, Jason Collins is becoming a household name. His interview in Sports Illustrated has been shared more than 200,000 times. The Los Angeles Dodgers’ Don Mattingly and Boston Celtics’ Doc Rivers compared him to Jackie Robinson. Rivers traded Collins last year to the Washington Wizards.

In his 38 starts this season, Collins scored an average of 1.1 points per game. His best season was in 2004-05 with the New Jersey Nets, when he scored 6.4 points per game. With that average, he would qualify for the 104th ranked offensive player in the league, scoring a quarter of what Griner averaged with Baylor last season.

Collins is a class act and a hero, but as a player, he’s no Brittney Griner.

And that’s okay. He doesn’t have to be.

After finishing his 14th season, Collins’ impact (as Busbee notes) will likely be felt with future generations of male pro sports players, who have their trail slightly more blazed. Collins might not be the best, but he’s here — and any sort of visibility is key.

Anna Aagenes, Executive Director of Go! Athletes, says this is a gender issue at its core.

“We talk a lot in the LGBT community about how sexism is a big part of what contributes to homophobia,” Aagenes told the Times. “It’s disheartening when there are so many great role model female athletes out that we’re so focused on waiting for a male pro athlete to come out in one of the four major sports.”

The Times piece argues that female athletes don’t battle perceptions that all of their peers are straight. It’s exactly the opposite. Griner’s bravery in sharing her sexuality isn’t seen as heroic — but an affirmation of the stereotype that all female athletes are lesbians.

Whereas NFL players Chris Kluwe and Brendon Ayanbadejo were praised for speaking out in support of gay athletes, their straight female counterparts haven’t been as supportive. They don’t want to uphold the gender stereotype.

When Jason Collins spoke to Sports Illustrated on Monday, he accidentally hit that nail on the head. Collins credited himself as the first out athlete in a “major American team sport,” and the WNBA isn’t “major.” The only time it’s ever brought up is as a punchline.

There’s even a Twitter and a Reddit for WNBA jokes. They’re usually about how underpaid WNBA players are. Here’s one: “How much does the highest paid WNBA player make? Sandwiches.”

It’s sexist, but it’s not far from the truth. Lisa Leslie, one of the greatest players in the history of the sport, made just $91,000 in 2006. That was the league limit. You couldn’t make more than that. The average salary for male players in the NBA is about $5 million. Jason Collins makes $1.3 million, ten times what Brittney Griner will likely make. Collins will become a household name, and Griner will be forgotten.

Before the draft, rumor had it that someone of Griner’s stature might pursue the NBA — like Michelle Wie and Danika Patrick, who had to prove their worth by competing against men. The suggestion implies Griner's only way of being taken seriously would be winning a man’s game. Forty years after King and things haven’t changed all that much. Women might have won the “battle of the sexes,” but they are losing the war.

Nico Lang writes about LGBTQ issues in Chicago. You can find Nico on Facebook, Twitter or Tumblr.