WBEZ | female body image http://www.wbez.org/tags/female-body-image Latest from WBEZ Chicago Public Radio en Body Talk: What Chicago author Samantha Irby gets right http://www.wbez.org/blogs/britt-julious/2013-12/body-talk-what-chicago-author-samantha-irby-gets-right-109308 <p><div><img alt="" class="image-original_image" src="http://www.wbez.org/system/files/styles/original_image/llo/insert-images/Meaty-_CHUNKY_UPPER_CASE_JAN_2013-624x998.jpg" style="float: left; height: 496px; width: 310px;" title="(Amazon)" />Chicago writer&nbsp;and performer&nbsp;<a href="http://bitchesgottaeat.blogspot.com/">Samantha Irby</a> is not obsessed with her body. She knows it for what it is, and keeps going anyway.&nbsp;</div><div>&nbsp;</div><div>&ldquo;Listen homie, that thing that you secretly hate about my body? Don&rsquo;t worry, I hate it, too. With every fiber in my weird, fibrous breasts,&quot; she writes in her essay &quot;Forest Whitaker&rsquo;s Neck,&quot; from her recent book, &quot;<a href="http://www.amazon.com/Meaty-Essays-Samantha-Creator-BitchesGottaEat/dp/0988480425">Meaty:&nbsp;Essays by&nbsp;Samantha Irby</a>.&quot;</div><div>&nbsp;</div><div>In the essay, she recounts a comment from a sort-of ex while in bed together. At the time she wasn&rsquo;t sure about the extent of their relationship, and his random comment&mdash;&ldquo;you have the tiniest nipples I have ever seen&rdquo;&mdash;certainly did not help.&nbsp;</div><div>&nbsp;</div><div>&ldquo;Every mark, every scar, every scratch, every flaw: I&rsquo;ve seen it, documented it, cried over it, and tried to hide it. Would it kill you to pretend it isn&rsquo;t there?&rdquo; she writes.</div><div>&nbsp;</div><div>Womens&#39; relationships with men are not like our relationships with ourselves. With ourselves, we see exactly what we walk with from day to day. In relationships, at least in the flawed relationships Irby tries to build, willful ignorance is the root of contentment.&nbsp;</div><div>&nbsp;</div><div>&ldquo;Can&rsquo;t we just lie fully clothed in bed together while holding hands and talking about how good pork belly tacos taste? I don&rsquo;t want to do the &quot;I&rsquo;m sorry this is my disgusting body&quot; apology jig ever again, nor will there ever be a time that the &ldquo;just let me keep my shirt on&rdquo; waltz isn&rsquo;t utterly humiliating,&rdquo; she writes.</div><div>&nbsp;</div><div>A blissful relationship, one before the rawness of seeing the body, her body, is what she wants. But like what she seeks in the actions of a man, this is willfully ignorant of the realities of partnership. Relationships are not all pretty and sweet. Like the body, there are things to critique and hate and finally accept about them, too.&nbsp;</div><div>&nbsp;</div><div>Later in &quot;Forest Whitaker&rsquo;s Neck,&quot; she recounts every detail of herself she does not like. &ldquo;Dark red mark from ingrown hair on the upper inside chunk of calf,&rdquo; she writes in the section about her left leg. &ldquo;Pale, raised scar from when I threw myself down a flight of stairs at age six as protest against accompanying my mother to the grocery store,&rdquo; she writes about her arms.</div><div>&nbsp;</div><div>Rather than just finding new and new things to hate, each mention of her body feels like a story brewing. She knows why she does not like it; she is still living and breathing anyway.&nbsp;</div><div>&nbsp;</div><div>Society understands women can be obsessed with the female body, but what we fail to realize is the extent of that obsession. As a young teen, I used to spend nights circling the worst areas of my body with a thick marker.&nbsp;</div><div>&nbsp;</div><div>Getting outside of my head was my biggest concern. Although I wrote down my fears and anxieties and anger in my notebook, writing was not enough. Pen and paper were just an extension of the obsessions of my mind. I repeated these fears and anxieties enough to call my journal less of an account of the things I did and more of an account of the things I could not let go.&nbsp;</div><div>&nbsp;</div><div>The body was (literally) the biggest one. At my obsessive peak, school markers turned into permanent markers. The circles stretched over the back of my thighs, my ass, the little tops of my shoulders&mdash;scarred from years of painful acne that never went away, but bubbled up to the service to fester in its own bacteria, leaving pockets of hyperpigmentation. Permanent marker was a &ldquo;permanent&rdquo; reminder. &#39;You will never be the person you want to be if you continue to look like this.&#39;</div><div>&nbsp;</div><div>My face, the worst, I never marked. I could control it&mdash;its roundness, acne, scars, discoloration&mdash;with makeup. Unlike clothing, which only served to remind me of of things I could not change or do with my body, makeup could transform me into something new. (That I could barely apply foundation evenly mattered little.)</div><div>&nbsp;</div><div>I am in a constant battle for control and conquest of the machinations and limitations of my body. It&#39;s why I danced until I was a teenager, and that is why I love to watch dance now, as a confirmation of achievement. Dance is knowing yourself, taking control of yourself, and seeing yourself&nbsp;completely. It is a truth that can be beautiful as much as it can be ugly in our wrestle for power.&nbsp;</div><div>&nbsp;</div><div>There is this idea&mdash;cold and inescapable&mdash;that we must be reminded of everything we lack. Some believe that we do not know that we are fat or tall or scarred. They think we do not see ourselves so they must remind us of how we exist in their eyes, how we lack something fundamental to the norm, how we are not right.&nbsp;</div><div>&nbsp;</div><div>But with adulthood comes the reckoning of our understanding of ourselves.</div><div>&nbsp;</div><div>Later in her essay, Irby adds, &ldquo;Or that&mdash;brace yourself&mdash;it might make me mysterious and sexy?&rdquo; She has been through the pains of literally growing into her body and she is beyond it, accepting of it; perhaps even a little proud of it.&nbsp;</div></p> Thu, 05 Dec 2013 05:00:00 -0600 http://www.wbez.org/blogs/britt-julious/2013-12/body-talk-what-chicago-author-samantha-irby-gets-right-109308 The beauty bias: How views on female bodies shape us http://www.wbez.org/blogs/nico-lang/2013-05/beauty-bias-how-views-female-bodies-shape-us-107171 <p><div class="image-insert-image "><img alt="" class="image-original_image" src="http://llnw.wbez.org/styles/original_image/llo/insert-images/AP110527150558.jpg" style="float: right; height: 177px; width: 350px;" title="Kim Kardashian in Monaco before her temporary nuptials. (AP/File)" />As a rule, I try not to think about Kim Kardashian much&mdash;especially her pregnancy, because I&rsquo;m concerned her child might be the anti-Christ. However, a friend recently made me consider Kardashian in a different light.</div><div class="image-insert-image ">&nbsp;</div><div class="image-insert-image ">Kiki Kirk <a href="http://inourwordsblog.com/2013/05/09/regurgitated-headlines-stop-body-shaming-celebrities/">wrote an article</a> last week for <em>In Our Words</em> about an experience she had riding the Metra. Kirk shared it with four women who were having an open dialogue on Kim Kardashian&rsquo;s body. One of them inquired about the state of Kim Kardashian&rsquo;s weight gain, asking if she was &quot;getting big,&quot; and the others quickly chimed in: &quot;She&rsquo;s huge!&quot; &quot;You could seriously fit two Kate Middletons inside of her at this point.&quot; &quot;And her boobs are the size of my head, but not in a good way.&quot;</div><div class="image-insert-image ">&nbsp;</div><div class="image-insert-image ">This is hardly the first time that formerly thin celebrities have been shamed for putting on pregnancy weight, and holding women like Jessica Simpson to a higher standard of beauty says a lot about what we expect of women. They aren&rsquo;t allowed to be real or &quot;own their own [bodies].&quot; Kirk says those women talked about Kardashian &quot;like she wasn&rsquo;t even a person.&quot;</div><div class="image-insert-image ">&nbsp;</div><div class="image-insert-image ">Such gossip is indicative of the internalized body shame many women feel and a culture that tells us to tear down women when they don&rsquo;t fit our expectations of womanhood. Body shame is the 21st century corset, binding us to one acceptable shape.</div><div class="image-insert-image ">&nbsp;</div><div class="image-insert-image ">Looking at the women on the train, Kirk thought about their children, who would receive many of these same messages about their bodies.</div><div class="image-insert-image ">&nbsp;</div><div class="image-insert-image ">Kirk writes, &ldquo;I wanted to tell them that no matter how many times you tell your daughter she&rsquo;s &#39;beautiful no matter what,&#39; when she hears you gossiping with your friends about how fat and ugly so-and-so is, she will look in a mirror and see fat and ugly. She will begin to hate herself because of the hate she heard spewing from your mouth.&quot;</div><div class="image-insert-image ">&nbsp;</div><div class="image-insert-image ">Girls are receiving these messages at increasingly younger ages&mdash;so much so that One Direction songs now include lyrics like, &quot;You still have to squeeze into your jeans / but you&rsquo;re perfect to me.&quot;</div><div class="image-insert-image ">&nbsp;</div><div class="image-insert-image ">After the band&rsquo;s clunkily written &quot;Little Things&quot; debuted, <em>Entertainment Weekly</em>&rsquo;s Grady Smith <a href="http://music-mix.ew.com/2012/10/29/one-direction-little-things/">asked</a> if young girls need those messages directed at them&quot;</div><div class="image-insert-image ">&nbsp;</div><div class="image-insert-image ">&quot;Last I checked, One Direction&rsquo;s fans aren&rsquo;t composed mainly of aging obesity victims &mdash; they&rsquo;re little girls who range in age from about 8-14,&quot; Smith argued. &quot;The carefree 9-year-olds who nibble on fruit roll-ups on the way to gymnastics class. The ones who watch <em>Good Luck Charlie</em> before bed, getting one last year out of their Sleeping Beauty nightgowns.&quot;</div><div class="image-insert-image ">&nbsp;</div><div class="image-insert-image ">Although I agree that the song feels strange and disingenuous coming from One Direction&rsquo;s line of Abercrombie models, Kirk&rsquo;s example shows exactly why better messages of body positivity are needed. This ideal version of a girlhood free from shame doesn&rsquo;t exist.</div><div class="image-insert-image ">&nbsp;</div><div class="image-insert-image ">In high school, I worked with a Teen Counseling program that provided classroom resources for local elementary and middle schools on issues facing their students. In the fifth grade class I facilitated, most of the girls were already on diets, and others were graduates of fat camp. One girl had already battled an eating disorder. She was 11. None of these girls looked like there was anything wrong with them to me, but I&rsquo;m not a preteen girl.</div><div class="image-insert-image ">&nbsp;</div><div class="image-insert-image ">These girls aren&rsquo;t alone. Research <a href="http://www.drrobynsilverman.com/body-image/fear-of-fat-in-tots-body-image-fat-hatred-in-preschoolers-young-children/">has shown</a> that girls as young as three&nbsp; internalize messages of body shame from the culture. In a study conducted on pre-schoolers, 3-5 year-olds were presented with &quot;fat and thin&quot; dolls, and those the children identified as &quot;fat&quot; were universally rejected.</div><div class="image-insert-image ">&nbsp;</div><div class="image-insert-image ">They were then shown images of big-bodied and skinny women, and &quot;children consistently labeled the &#39;chubby&#39; figure as &#39;mean&#39; and the thin figure as &#39;nice.&#39;&quot; Children were more likely to identify the skinny girl as the one they would most like to be friends with or &quot;be like,&quot; and this was true for respondents in every body type bracket.</div><div class="image-insert-image ">&nbsp;</div><div class="image-insert-image ">According to <a href="http://www.drrobynsilverman.com/body-image/fear-of-fat-in-tots-body-image-fat-hatred-in-preschoolers-young-children/">another 2003 study</a>, when &quot;presented with pictures of children who were in a wheelchair, missing a limb, on crutches, disfigured, or obese, most young children voiced that they would least prefer to play with the child who was considered &#39;fat.&#39;&quot;</div><div class="image-insert-image ">&nbsp;</div><div class="image-insert-image ">Such sentiments can have incredibly harmful effects on female self-perception, and <a href="http://brainblogger.com/2007/11/19/body-image-research/">studies indicate</a> that &quot;the mental well-being of [big bodied] women to be worse than that of the chronically ill or even severely disabled.&quot;</div><div class="image-insert-image ">&nbsp;</div><div class="image-insert-image ">As the <em>Wall Street Journal</em>&rsquo;s Jeffrey Zaslow <a href="http://online.wsj.com/article/SB10001424052970204731804574386822245731710.html?mod=wsj_share_facebook#project%3DSLIDESHOW08%26s%3DSB10001424052970204731804574386983833676894%26articleTabs%3Darticle">argued</a>, this shame will last them the rest of their life, and it&rsquo;s especially crucial we fight negative self-perception at a young age.</div><div class="image-insert-image ">&nbsp;</div><div class="image-insert-image ">In 2009, Zaslow followed up with fourth-grade girls he profiled back in 1986, when 80 percent of their peers were dieting. Instead of getting better, their body perception was &quot;even worse.&quot;</div><div class="image-insert-image ">&nbsp;</div><div class="image-insert-image ">&quot;They and their peers have never escaped society&#39;s obsession with body image,&quot; Zaslow explained. &quot;Some told stories of damaging diets and serious self-esteem issues regarding their weight.&quot;</div><div class="image-insert-image ">&nbsp;</div><div class="image-insert-image ">By the time girls reach college, around 8 in 10 report a <a href="http://depts.washington.edu/thmedia/view.cgi?section=bodyimage&amp;page=fastfacts">negative body perception</a>, and one in 10 will <a href="http://depts.washington.edu/thmedia/view.cgi?section=bodyimage&amp;page=fastfacts">suffer</a> a &quot;clinical or nearly clinical eating disorder.&quot; In 2012, a <a href="http://depts.washington.edu/thmedia/view.cgi?section=bodyimage&amp;page=fastfacts">survey</a> from Glamour magazine &quot;found that 41 percent of 18 to 24-year-old women retouch their own photos before posting them to social media sites.&quot; Photoshopped images of models tell women how they look doesn&#39;t measure up. &quot;Perfect&quot; isn&#39;t good enough, and even Kim Kardashian doesn&#39;t fit the mold.</div><div class="image-insert-image ">&nbsp;</div><div class="image-insert-image ">Much focus is placed on the media&rsquo;s agenda-setting function in setting standards of female beauty, as the <a href="http://www.webmd.com/beauty/style/helping-girls-with-body-image">average girl</a> receives around three hours of media exposure each day. Most of the images they receive of women will be directed toward their appearance, as 37 percent of articles for young women and 50 percent of ads targeting them focus on beauty. In film, research <a href="http://www.webmd.com/beauty/style/helping-girls-with-body-image">tells us</a> that &quot;58% of female characters had comments made about their looks,&quot; a rate twice as high as their male counterparts.</div><div class="image-insert-image ">&nbsp;</div><div class="image-insert-image ">However, Kirk shows that the problem isn&rsquo;t just the media. It&rsquo;s all of us, as our culture affords a privilege to those considered beautiful. UK&rsquo;s <a href="http://www.sirc.org/publik/mirror.html">Social Issues Research Center</a> argues that attractive children are more likely to be favored as job applicants and co-workers, where they are more likely to be promoted or earn higher salaries. They are less likely to be found guilty of a crime by a jury of their peers and if convicted, they face shorter sentences.</div><div class="image-insert-image ">&nbsp;</div><div class="image-insert-image ">Throughout their school years, it&rsquo;s not just other students that shower affection on attractive kids. The SIRC <a href="http://www.sirc.org/publik/mirror.html">found</a> that &quot;teachers give higher evaluations to the work of attractive children and have higher expectations of them, which has been shown to improve performance.&quot; Although adults should be setting an example for children, they are contributing to our &quot;<a href="http://www.thedailybeast.com/newsweek/2010/06/04/our-beauty-bias-is-unfair.html">beauty bias</a>.&quot;</div><div class="image-insert-image ">&nbsp;</div><div class="image-insert-image ">Do you think my fifth grade girls were enrolling themselves in <a href="http://live.huffingtonpost.com/r/segment/childhood-obesity-psychological-effects-adulthood/50ac2984fe34443902000232">fat camps</a>? They had to be put there.</div><div class="image-insert-image ">&nbsp;</div><div class="image-insert-image ">In an <a href="http://www.pbs.org/parents/raisinggirls/bodies/image.html">article for PBS</a>, Catherine Steiner-Adair argued that the pressures we place on young women starts when they are born, when parents instill &quot;gender-based expectations on how girls should behave and what should interest them.&quot;</div><div class="image-insert-image ">&nbsp;</div><div class="image-insert-image ">&quot;Adults respond so much to what a girl looks like that by age five or six, young girls are getting the notion that their body is their selling point,&quot; Adair wrote. &quot;When body image, clothes, marketing for girls is so sexual, it is that much harder for girls to develop a healthy, non-sexualized relationship with their bodies.&quot;</div><div class="image-insert-image ">&nbsp;</div><div class="image-insert-image ">We learn so much about the world from our parents and raising a body positive generation of kids means de-emphasizing the premium we place on looks. The One Direction model of body positivity means telling girls they are secretly beautiful&mdash;but only you can see it, as their mate or parents. It&#39;s what Alexandra of <em>Feministing</em> <a href="http://feministing.com/2013/04/16/dove-real-beauty-one-direction/">argues</a> is the problem with Dove&#39;s &quot;<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XpaOjMXyJGk">Real Beauty</a>&quot; campain: &quot;The message&mdash;that you&rsquo;re thinner than you think you are&mdash;reinforces the assumption that thinness is valuable.&quot;</div><div class="image-insert-image ">&nbsp;</div><div class="image-insert-image ">Instead, Adair argues parents should compliment girls on their intelligence, stamina, perseverance, courage or ability to be a good friend&mdash;the same way they do for boys. Rather than continuing to oversexualize young girls, adults need to change the conversation and tell girls life is more than about how you look. It&#39;s what you&#39;re made of.</div><div class="image-insert-image ">&nbsp;</div><div class="image-insert-image ">I&rsquo;ll never meet the women who rode the train with Kiki Kirk, who expressed concern and sorrow for Kim Kardashian&rsquo;s unborn baby. &quot;Sh*t. I feel so sorry for that child,&rdquo; one woman said. I might dislike Kim Kardashian, but it&rsquo;s not her kid I&rsquo;m worried about. I feel sorry for theirs.</div><div class="image-insert-image ">&nbsp;</div><div class="image-insert-image "><em>Nico Lang writes about LGBTQ issues in Chicago. You can find Nico on <a href="http://www.facebook.com/nicorlang">Facebook</a>, <a href="http://www.twitter.com/nico_lang">Twitter</a> or <a href="http://achatwithnicolang.tumblr.com">Tumblr</a>.</em></div></p> Wed, 15 May 2013 05:00:00 -0500 http://www.wbez.org/blogs/nico-lang/2013-05/beauty-bias-how-views-female-bodies-shape-us-107171