Writer, performer and comedian Dennis O’Toole takes on the religion beat, and explains how on earth he can be a practicing, progressive Catholic in 2012. Read an excerpt, or listen below.

“Imaginary people ask me all the time: ‘Dennis, what’s it like being a practicing Catholic in 2012?’ Well, I say, you know when you’re at your sister’s wedding and you get into a fist fight with the DJ because the guy doesn’t have any Blue Oyster Cult? Then your brand-new brother-in-law tries to intervene. So your dad kicks him in the nuts, and then pukes on him? It kind of feels like that.”

This Saturday at the Horseshoe, you’ll see Steve Waltien of the Second City main stage, Kate James of Schadenfraude, puppeteer Noah Ginex, and a tribute to the late Chicago comic Mike Enriquez by Ryan Patrick Dolan.

The Paper Machete is a weekly live magazine at the Horseshoe in North Center. It’s always at 3 p.m., it’s always on Saturday, and it’s always free. Get all your The Paper Machete Radio Magazine needs filled here, or download the podcast from iTunes here.