A story: Big ups to Bill Healy for showing me this Newsweek spread. The headline of this article is “Chicago Steps Out. The Second City is finally hip. Now Rahm has to keep it rolling.” Seriously. The photos in the article show the faces of new Chicago: Desiree Rogers and David Axelrod. Um, Rogers ran the lotto. And then let some pranksters crash the White House. Sorry, she’s not my city’s face. And David Axelrod? The new face of Chicago? What is happening here? 

Chicago is not hip because of Rahm. Sorry, but it might actually be the exact opposite. Mayor Elect Emanuel seems to play best to the middle-earth section of Chicago. You know, downtown, Lakeview, Lincoln Park, etc. Last I checked, rich didn’t necessarily equal hip. As for making the argument that we are the hottest city in America - remember that it is 2011, three years past Obama’s election. So the thesis of this article should be “Chicago is STILL the hottest city.”

Terrible marks. Worst article of the day. Back to the drawing board with the new Newsweek, Ms. Brown (I’m a huge fan, btw).

B story: Here’s my inattentive analysis of the Weis/CPD situation. Please correct me if I’m off base here: Weis’ contract is up. Mayor Elect Emanuel already said Weis is not his guy. Daley asked Weis to stay on for two more months, without an extension. Weis said get lost, I gots to get paid!!!! Rumors have it that Weis will enter the private security business. I would hire him, just based on those guns (not real guns, his arms). So what does Daley do? He goes back to the well and brings in my main man Terry Hilliard, who since being CPD chief back in 90’s has been running his own private security firm. For those who didn’t live in Chicago the last time Hilliard was at the helm, get ready for a no-nonsense police chief who looks a little bit like Lou Gosset Jr.

C story: Groupon is being sued by a fan of Whirly Ball. The fan didn’t use his coupon on time, now he’s suing. Wait, Whirly Ball is still open? How is it that we live in a city where the economy claims Carson Pirie Scott and Borders but Whirly Ball is thriving?

Weather: It’s deceivingly cold. Sun is shining, but it’s windy.

Sports: Tommie Harris is out. Here’s something to consider when digesting the news that Tommie Harris has been cut by the Chicago Bears. When Harris was drafted, several teams passed on the monster talent because of injury concerns. He fell to the Bears in the middle of the first round. Harris proved he could play, but after a few big injuries, lost his edge. So when you watch ESPN’s Mel Kiper Jr. talk about “injury concerns” when predicting draft classes, take note. So the question I have for you Bears fans…was Tommie Harris a bust? Did we make a mistake drafting him eight years ago?

Kicker: Alderman Ed Bus is making his first post-election appearance tonight at the Drinking & Writing show at the Haymarket Pub. They are making a new Alderman Ed Bus brew. Seriously, the fake alderman has a real beer named after him.