And in a couple of weeks, it will never have happened

And in a couple of weeks, it will never have happened

News Headline: “The latest tweets about the Colorado ‘Dark Knight Rises’ shooting.”
News Headline: “The Colorado shooting aftermath: A slide show.”
Give us time.
We’ll have this completely trivialized in another few days.

News Headline: “Obama joins Romney in gun-control silence after shootings.”
We take our bipartisanship where we can find it.
Even when it involves two grown men hiding.

QT XXX Summer Olympics Games UpdVIII:
London betting houses are offering CCL-to-I odds that every team in the IVxCD-meter relay final will drop its baton.

News Headline: “Romney can’t connect with middle class.”
Let’s help him out and start calling it the “servant class” again.

News Item: ”. . and unless there’s been a high precipitation event, you can usually find some fishable waters as… ."
When did a heavy rain become a high precipitation event, and when can we have rain back?
And Ellen Hinsch, a Columbia, S.C., reader, wants to know when a sale became a “temporary price reduction,” and when can we have sales back?
And… .

Why We Should Have Started Doing Something Yesterday About The Day After Tomorrow Update:
The Greenland ice sheet melted at an unprecedented rate this month — so fast that scientists seeing the satellite images thought the satellites were malfunctioning.

News Headline: “Were the penalties against Penn State appropriate or not?”
Of course they were.
If anyone needs punishment here, it is the students in the stands, the cheerleaders, the members of the marching band… .
The trouble with our society is that innocent people have been getting away too much.

News Headline: “Romney swipes Obama: ‘I won’t apologize for America.’ “
News Headline: “Romney misquotes Australian foreign minister.”
We all make mistakes.
Maybe a small apology is in order.

Modern Education + the Criminal Mind =
Police say a new counterfeiter is at work in Idaho.
The counterfeiter is making $1 bills.

News Item: “Rep. Darrell Issa (R-Calif.) is floating legislation that would name most U.S. coastal waters after former President Ronald Reagan… ."
High time we did something like this.
Until now, President Reagan’s name could be found on only an international airport, 22 highways and roads, 12 schools, seven government buildings and six parks.
And an aircraft carrier.
And a mountain.
Not that anyone is counting.

President Obama addressing this year’s American Olympians:
“You Olympians, however, know you didn’t get here solely on your own power. For most of you, loving parents, sisters or brothers, encouraged your hopes, coaches guided, communities built venues in order to organize competitions. All Olympians stand on the shoulders of those who lifted them.”
Then again, what do you expect from a collectivist lefty—
No. Wait.
That was Mitt Romney addressing the 2002 American Olympians.

QT News You Can Use:
A group of physicists has predicted that the Earth will explode 16 minutes before the end of time.

News Headline: “Man attacked with toilet cover, guitar.”
There is probably an interesting story behind that.

From the QT Archive of Knowledge:
+ There were 2,973 figure skaters in Pennsylvania in 1982.
+ Hamsters can wink.

News Headline: “Otsego Lake deeper than thought.”
No. Depends on who is doing the thinking.

QT Worldwide Man-Bites-Dog Pinpoint Locator:
As of the twenty-second dog day of summer, there have been no new reports of a man biting a dog.
But an otter bit a triathlete last week in Island Lake near Duluth, Minn.
Hey. QT is doing the best it can.
There are 17 dog days to go.

QT Grammar R Us Seminar on the English Language:
News Item: ”… If your portfolio is invested mainly in guilt-edged securities… ."
Most of the securities on Wall Street these days are guilt-edged.
And Tom Padwa, a Warren, R.I., reader, regarding QT’s mention of news stories describing “wonton violence” and “wanton soup,” recalls a restaurant that advertised a “specious dining room.”
The next time you serve crepes in your specious dining room, by the way, remember that “crepe” rhymes with “prep.”

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QT appears Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays.