News Headline: “Cities opening more video surveillance eyes.”
News Headline: “Thousands of cameras keep tabs on Chicago.”
News Headline: “Drones over America: Are they spying on you?”
Happy 109th Birthday, George Orwell!
Chicago ranks third in the world (and first in the U.S.) in one study of the largest city surveillance networks, by the way.
Beijing is number one.
News Item: “A massive asteroid that zipped by Earth last week is actually twice as large as scientists originally thought… ."
But there is no threat of its hitting us any time soon.
Well. According to the same scientists.
J.F., an Arlington, Va., reader, regarding QT’s noting that three of five Americans can’t name the three branches of government, writes:
“Everyone should know that the three branches of our government are Moe, Larry and Curly.”
In other news, Moe is expected to share his thoughts this week on the nation’s new health-care plan.
QT Vote Count Countdown Update:
News Headline: “Are Super PACS harming our politics?”
News Headline: “Wisconsin’s Scott Walker: 2016 presidential frontrunner?”
News Headline: “Could Ronald Reagan lead today’s GOP?”
News Headline: “Will text-message contributions save Obama’s re-election effort?”
News Headline: “Are Republicans trying to stall the economy?”
News Headline: “Is Romney’s Massachusetts record really as bad as Obama says?”
News Headline: “Will Romney change his stance on immigration?”
News Headline: “Is Florida trying to purge legitimate voters?”
Yes, no, no, no, yes, no, more than once, yes.
Just trying for efficiency here.
Modern Education + the Criminal Mind =
Three teenagers in Ocean City, Md., were careful to shut off the lights in their car as they smoked marijuana while parked in front the police station during a shift change, police said.
News Headline: “Vatican gets Fox media adviser.”
Why would the Vatican want advice from a news operation notorious for expecting its followers to accept a view of reality based on little more than blind faith and repeated catch-phrases?
News Headline: “Loom workers threaten to strike.”
News Headline: “Loom strikes loom.”
Sorry. Made the second one up.
But it was a headline that needed to be written.
Lest We Forget that the Dark Ages Were a Faith-Based Initiative:
Half the people you see on the street believe God created humans in their present form within the last 10,000 years, according to a recent poll.
News Headline: “Friends of NRA support the shooting sports.”
News Headline: “Two dead, 13 wounded in weekend shootings.”
News Headline: “19 wildfires sparked by guns in Utah so far.”
There are so many shooting sports it is sometimes hard to keep track of them.
News Headline: “Report: Lawmakers trade millions in stock for companies lobbying on bills they oversee.”
The system works.
News Item: “The Pentagon celebrated the Army’s 237th birthday today with a tank made from 5,000 cupcakes… ."
It is an army’s duty to strike fear in the hearts of its enemies.
So no creampuffs were served.
Only the bunch of cupcakes.
News Item: “Officials in Beijing have ruled that public restrooms in the Chinese capital can have no more than two flies in them at one time.”
Whoa. Wait. Do even the flies in China follow orders?
News Headline: “Prominent banker named Greek finance minister.”
News Headline: “New Greek finance minister faints.”
QT usually favors the spit-take, but we should be grateful for any slapstick we can get from our world leaders.
News Headline: “Topless feminist disrupts psychic pig’s feeding time.”
There is probably an interesting story behind that.
From the QT Archive of Knowledge:
+ There are 627 clocks in the British Parliament.
+ There are 672 fire-hose cabinets in the Pentagon.
QT Grammar R Us Seminar on the English Language:
R.F., a Chicago reader, writes:
“While I was watching ‘Hardball’ on MSNBC, I noticed a Republican strategist describe Mitt Romney’s speech to a Latino convention as ‘generally specific.’ Does this mean Romney speaks in specific generalities?”
In general. But not specifically.
A group of hippopotamuses is called a bloat of hippopotamuses, by the way.
Write to QT at email@example.com
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