Top story: Rosie O’Donnell is now a Lakeview resident? C’mon Rosie. Living in Lakeview is sort of like living in Midtown Manhattan. Yeah, it’s affluent, but pretty dull. If I were Rosie’s realtor, I would have shown hot property on the lakefront, down by Soldier Field. A doorman, a pool, a whole floor (Sammy Sosa style) and just ridin’ dirty! Instead, she must have used the Apartment People on Broadway, who only show you a 20 block radius of the city. Rosie, you are a New Yorker. New Yorkers don’t live in Lakeview. Big Ten graduates live in Lakeview. I would have accepted Lincoln Park or even Gold Coast, but Lakeview? I dunno. 

And what about transportation? I mean, every day Rosie is going to have a tough decision. Do you walk to the Belmont L and take it down to the Madison 20 bus or do you get on the Halsted bus and walk the rest? Tough commute to Harpo, either way.

B story: Chicago was named the 4th most powerful city in the worrrrrrrlllllllllllddddddddd!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

C story: Love is…not having to read Love is… in the Sun-Times anymore. The popular (?) cartoon quietly disappeared this week. Can you believe that? Love is… was the one piece of the daily paper that you just despised. You couldn’t believe that people got paid for that. And then after a while, it just became part of your daily read. Not because you liked it, but because you wanted something to rile you up in the morning. Now it’s gone. And even though I probably haven’t read it in about three years, I am torn. And a little bit sad.

Weather: I would call today, lukecold.

Sports: Did you know that NASCAR is in town this weekend? I was watching SportsCenter last night and they set up their “NASCAR Now” set on Navy Pier! I got a screenshot. Today’s assignment? To be that one NASCAR fan waving in the back. Wish me luck!

Also, Urlacher is back. Memo to pundits: Stop with the comparisons to Favre. Urlacher will have a good game, but the expectation shouldn’t be that he will have 14 tackles and 8 sacks and 4 interceptions because his mom died. Maybe 10 tackles and 3 sacks and one pick would be better.

Kicker: Have a good weekend. I hope your neighborhood has a sign that tells you what’s going on: