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Ozzie is going to be a World Series analyst. Maybe that's what caused the freight train derailment?

Ooooh, the Bubbly Creek is oozing with freight train fluid today. It tastes like chicken. We love a freight train derailment! Those are the best derailments, because no one gets hurt. Well, except the thousand commuters who were late to work today. But seriously, who cares about them. We all get to enjoy a freight train derailment! Today, Todd Stroger follows Mayor Daley's lead with the Cook County budget address. My guess? He is going to institute a tax on freight train derailments. We will be tweeting live. One more note about plans to derail Venetian Night: Doesn't the night bring tens of thousands to the lakefront? Wouldn't it be smart to maybe kill off one of the downtown parades instead? I watched the Columbus Day parade - I think there were more people in the Navy Pier food court than those attending that parade. Kill it. We'll celebrate Columbus Day and Italian-American heritage at Venetian Night.

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