Hold your horses, Chicago: No linen or white pants until AFTER Memorial Day

Hold your horses, Chicago: No linen or white pants until AFTER Memorial Day
Hold your horses, Chicago: No linen or white pants until AFTER Memorial Day

Hold your horses, Chicago: No linen or white pants until AFTER Memorial Day

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There are several top stories today. The Tahawwur Rana trial, Rahm and the Blago trial, ComEd might raise rates. All those stories are wonderful, exciting and must-read news stories. But I have a better one:

The abuse of white pants and linen before Memorial Day.

Would you make a citizen's arrest if you saw this guy on Michigan Ave?

I’m no fashion blogger or part of any fashion authority. But I do have a few pair of linen pants and I have been forbidden to bring them out until AFTER Memorial Day, based on some tribal law that if broken will be bring you shame. If caught, I would have to wear a Scarlet L.

So to my surprise, the good weather has prompted several linen/white pants spotting in Chicago. So we have a problem. Either we enforce this with tickets/fines/arrests or we try to change the fashion world’s mentality to start linen season early. Thoughts?

B story: The Rana terror trial is underway. The quick cheat sheet on this trial: Tahawwur Rana is on trial for providing support to terrorists - the same terrorists who attacked several locations in Mumbia, India a few years back. The government’s star witness is David Headley, who was busted in October ‘09 for helping out in the planning. In exchange for Headley’s testimony against his alleged partner, Rana, Headley is avoiding the death penalty. So this big trial started yesterday with opening statements and then the prosecution called Headley right off the bat. Boom, get the superstar out and in front of the jury quick. Headley showed up yesterday for his big moment in the sun with a polo shirt and running jacket on. It’s federal court, homey. And you are trying to convice a bunch of judges and lawyers to spare your life. Maybe put on a tie? I don’t care if the feds say it’s a choking hazard. Rise above.

C story: So if the Blagojevich lawyers want to call Mayor Rahm Emanuel, he will come to court. Something tells me that the Blago lawyers will do just that, for the hope of sullying another politician’s name. I’m not sure if the mayor will have anything to say to help, and probably has more dirt on the former governor than what Blago’s charged with. But heck, how great would it be for the new mayor to hit the stand in a corruption trial before finishing his first full month in office. Only in Chicago.

Weather: I have to say, the Chicago Tribune severe weather blog was tops on Sunday night. With the threat of tornados coming through the Chicago area, I just pictured Skilling doing spots on WGN, CLTV and hunting and pecking that there were reports of roof damage at a post office in Belvidere. Awesome.

Sports: I must be the only person in Chicago that couldn’t care less about what a fan yelled at Noah to trigger his courtside rant and gay slur. C’mon, this contrary opinion that it was the fan’s fault or the media’s fault for trying to catch athletes in “gotcha” moments in absurd. This kind of blathering commentary happens when jocks become sports columnists and analysts. I watched Jeff Van Gundy and Mark Jackson last night (OKC/Dallas game) talk about the incident and put the blame on fans (they say hurtful things!) and the television cameras for having to cut back to Noah to catch him in a “gotcha” moment. Hilarious. Yeah, it couldn’t be Noah’s fault? If he were mad at a fan, he could have told the guy off with different language. The NBA has made it clear that you can’t use that word at work. And David Haugh in the Tribune had the best point: It’s just a lack of discipline. Noah used lazy language. And as a highly paid basketball player, you should have more discipline in all parts of your work. Not just on the court.

Also, did you see A.J. Pierzynski play a secret service agent and protect former President George W. Bush from a foul ball?

Kicker: Derrick Rose’s new commercial features the “L”, the Chicago skyline and light shoes: